The Nativity Story

I am listening to "the Nativity Story" sacred songs, something that I really have reverence for. I think that I am beginning to understand the words 'sacred' and 'holy'.

Rejoice, Rejoice

There are so many things that come to my sometimes wandering heart

What makes sense in this life? That it indeed seems destined to go on. For a reason God knows people come into the world.

Good people are taught to share and to give and to love. And bad people are not taught anything. I was watching the movie with my lover, my friend, the best person that I have ever known, my husband Ray.

I know that people think that belief is a lot of bad things, but in my heart I know different.

I know that I was a person that could not believe in anything and then my heart changed. And all the things that were taken from me were given back. I found them in my lover, my friend, my father Jesus. I don't think that I even knew that I was looking for anything. I was frightened by this temporary life. I was disillusioned by what I saw adults doing all the time.

I was 20, and I knew that something was so desperately missing from this thing that I called my life. Like the excuses that peel away from a rotting vegetable, or the infection debreeded by the gentle surgeon...every so carefully to the girl that never smiled...God became real, about 25 years ago. Not only real but dimensional, so that I could never tire of Him or forget Him.

Along with Him and very soon came a husband and two small children.

Sometimes along the way Satan would deceive me that I thought and would think that I was not worthy or right to be this person that God called me to be and depression like nothing I had ever experienced would fog into my world unexplainably.

And moments of an insidious sadness would threaten the edges of my soul, till I remembered like Christmas that He loves me, no matter what I think. Oh to own that I am safe and kept by the Prince of Peace.

Loved.

O little town of Bethlehem by Jackie Velasquez